The dates were right. The list of personnel named the right (code)names. The summary of events was far too detailed until, suddenly, they seemed to gloss over everything at once. Whoever had written the report also decided to switch from rounded bulletpoints to square ones halfway, which was annoying.
As was the fact that - despite the 63rd Floor seeming almost completely empty and his table being the only one that was occupied by folders, papers, and a single paper cup rattling quietly with an iced beverage - someone, somewhere was continuously making noise by rubbing two rubber balloons together.
Dart did not wish to find out who it was, because then it would make him want to kill them.
Back to the report at hand, though - everything had seemed in order. So as an utterly meaningless gesture, he signed on the dotted line with his fake name - which if ever investigated was going to turn up that he had long been fired, or since died, or had never worked there in the first place. It all depended on what was going to be convenient when the time came.
But that would be then, until which procedures were still necessary.
He pushed the document under the pile, finally, and that was the third done out of a ballpark of around 20 more to go.
Azure knew this because her name, as well as the joyously colorful message of "Happy Birthday!" had been emblazoned on a number of remaining balloons on the upper level of Shin-Ra's recreational floor 63. What Azure did not know, however, was who Holly really even was; that she was a fresh-faced, 24-year-old Accounts Payable clerk that grew up in the slums of Sector 5. That she, after a life of studying by second-hand sunlight filtered through the steel sky, and tiny dim bulbs fueled by enormous mako reactors, finally broke through and landed a job at the Shin-Ra Corporation. And that later this evening--possibly even right now!-- she would become engaged when her current beau would drop to one knee and pop the big question.
Of course, Azure did not know any of this since he wasn't invited to the party.
Not that he minded.
... If it could even be called a party. Just a small get-together in the big break room right after office hours, where they congratulated her and gossiped and shared drinks and slices of cake, hours-old evidence of which still lingered as crumbs on the table where the fishman was currently sitting.
Sitting and, rather absent-mindedly, rubbing two rubber balloons together.
It had started as just a self-amusing investigation in static electricity, one of those phenomenon he had learned all about while spending 14 years in a stasis tank and hooked up to Shin-Ra's passive learning program; rubbing one balloon against his vest and then using it to pick up the crumbs on the table. After a couple minutes of interest though, it quickly dissolved into what it was now-- just rubbing two balloons together and... makin' noise. Staring out the floor-to-ceiling windows into the flashy lights of the city beyond. Pondering the nature of birthdays and parties and how they relate to somebody born from a test tube.
... And finding that, maybe he did mind a little. Or maybe he just wanted some cake.
Azure need not be mentioned or interacted with by anyone going forward. I just could not help myself with the stupid opportunity presented. Please just assume that he is continuing to make noise until further notice.
Oh, he didn't know just how long it was going to be just yet.
The doorknob of the office clicked as it was slowly turned, before the door swung open as it was pushed by a man carrying a veritable mountain of paperwork with both hands, the blonde needing to use both his back and butt to enter into the room.
A moment of silence elapsed as GAWAIN allowed the sight to sink in for Dart, knowing the young man would probably need a couple of minutes.
He sure had the first few times it had happened to him a decade or so ago.
"Hi." He said after a while, peering around his mountain of paperwork with a bright smile at his relatively regular partner-in-crime. "So... funny thing." He started.
Nothing about this seemed funny in the slightest, however.
"Remember Operation CORONA?" He said, pausing for a moment to look for the right words, his smile a bit more obviously forced than usual. That particular operation, had, ah... Not gone as planned, per say- thought nobody could say it hadn't been seen through to the end.
For better or worse.
It had occurred damn near a year ago.
"Well... It seems they finally managed to process all the damages." He said somewhat grimly, his smile seeming resigned.
Which could only mean one thing.
"We got all the papers for the injuries, loss of life, destruction of property, theft-" He began to list as he walked around the office's coffee table, making his way up to Dart's desk before unceremoniously dropping the pile next to his formerly remaining paperwork. "Arson, murder, public nudity, and jay walking."
That was the last time either of them worked with newbie Turks and SOLDIERs. Probably. If they had any say on it for once.
"I, ah... Well, you know how it is. They need this tomorrow. Early." Apparently, went unsaid.
Another moment of silence elapsed.
"I'll go get us some coffee." It went without saying, but GAWAIN would be filling out a lot of that paperwork as well. "... And deal with the serial balloon molester." He grumbled, reaching for the bridge of his nose and grinding it with his thumb and index finger. His patience, already pushed too far by the sudden late night influx of paperwork was not up for the task of dealing with this.
Exiting the Office, the not-so-young man made his way throught the halls of floor 63 before arriving to the large break area, were the presumanbly infinite coffee machine could be found awaiting for him.
As well as some sort of bloody Sahagin that had apparently sneaked into the HQ. All the way to floor 63.
No, wait, he knew this one. So actually, had sneaked out of HQ's labs up in 65, and had now found a brand new way to test everyone's patience.
BONK!
The flat side of a sword smacked Azure in the head- (relatively lightly; more of an annoyance, really) the blonde man looming behind him now, staring him down and looking mighty unamused despite his smile. Actually, his smile just made him look scary.
"... To your room. Now, Six." He said, pointing a finger up, "I don't have the patience for this tonight. Isn't it past your bedtime anyway, young man?"
If Gawain's love tap had any sort of noticable effect upon its target, he certainly did not show it at first, hardly even moving after being struck with the flat of a blade. Instead, the fishman just continued to stare listlessly out those enormous windows into the evening twilight, still rubbing those balloons together without meaning or malice.
Squeak-squeak.
Squeak-squeak.
After a couple of seconds though, as if stirred from some kind of dream, Azure finally turned his head slowly to see who had assaulted him, meeting with rather perturbed visage of a SOLDIER. No, more like... extremely exasperated. Certainly that smile would be enough to strike fear into the heart of any natural-born man, woman, or child.
"Oh, hello Sir Gawain."
Of course, Azure VI was none of the above.
"I do not have a room. Or a bed, per se. Also, it seems that my modified physiology may not require the same quantity of sleep that a person does, therefore making a bedtime somewhat unnecessary. However, the Team is still investigating what effect that may have upon my mental state." The sea creature paused again here, his pupil-less eyes somehow visibly losing focus on Gawain for a moment.
But then, he was back, and suddenly holding up one of his two colorful floating prizes for the SOLDIER to inspect. "Ah. Sir Gawain. Did you know it was Holly's birthday today? Please wish her a Happy Birthday when you see her next as I am unable to." His finned hands let go of both balloons at this point, allowing them to lazily meander towards the break room ceiling while under his watchful gaze. And when they arrived there, bumping into it with a small 'bonk' much like the one he had received earlier, Azure quietly whispered, "... Curious."
But he returned his attention to the SOLDIER before him afterwards, looking up from his still seated position. "I am surprised to find that you are also still in the office at this advanced hour, sir. To what do I owe the honor? May I assist you with something? I am authorized to provide support to all members and rank of the Public Safety Department as well as the Department of Administrative Research, as I am sure you know."
The second he saw the size of the pile of paperwork brought in by Gawain, Dart froze.
He shot the SOLDIER dead right then and there, before burning the entire HQ to the ground and catching the next cruise to Costa del Sol, where he married a woman named Violet and ran a successful seaside pub with her for the next 30 years.
Or at least, that was what he should have done.
Instead, he sat still while the colour and emotion simply drained from his face. The smile left behind was one that was more porcelain and less sincere than ever.
He remained silent for the time Gawain was in the room, until a final, distant squeak finally had him snapping the pen in his left hand into two splintered pieces.
"... And deal with the serial balloon molester."
"You do that."
He flipped very roughly through the stack, took the top document from the pile after Gawain left, read through it, marked out (new pen) a few corrections on each of the page, then doubled back to see if he had missed anything. When he was done he glanced up at the clock, and did some mental math on how much time had passed multiplied by the approximate number of items left before him. By his estimation, he would be done in time to see his grandson's twenty-first birthday.
He pushed himself up from the desk in one swift motion, and marched out of the room with purpose. It was easy to follow the sound of chatter to locate the man who had so readily deserted the night's tasks two minutes in, along with the presence of someone surprising - but no more pleasant.
"Sir Gawain," it definitely sounded different coming from him. "Are you having trouble locating the coffee machine? I suppose wanton destruction is more a SOLDIER's forte than getting drinks."
His eyes went to the fishman.
"And you, Mister, are the molestor of said balloons, presumably," he said. "Interested in helping out with paperwork? Or does your vat have a curfew you're breaking?"
He didn't really have any response to the experiment's words, other than: POP! POP! POP!
The thunderous sounds of each and every balloon getting popped echoed throughout the cafeteria as GAWAIN stared the lab experiment down in silence.
His sword was slowly lowered back to his side, having successfully murdered every balloon as the man's eyes closed gently and he tilted his head slightly to the side, smiling.
"I'm glad you feel happy for Ms. Holly, she is a true hard worker and a wonderful person. I will let her know you wish her well." The sore loser began, "And yes- I do have quite the task ahead of me tonight. Thank you for the kind offer! Unfortunately, you don't possess the authority or clearance to assist me. Perhaps next time, Six."
And speaking of that work, the man tried not to stiffen too much when Dart's carefully polite voice rang through the cafeteria, his steps following shortly after.
Ah, right.
"My my, Somebody's grumpy. So rude." He replied with a sigh, smile a little smaller. "I got slightly distracted with our balloonist here, that's all. Have you two been officially presented to one another? I'll leave you two to it."
With that, he turned on his heel and began making his way to the coffee machine. If Dart was gonna be like this and Six was here to stay all night, GAWAIN would need a lot of it.
The resounding pop-pop-pop of the remnant party balloons being so efficiently disposed of had more or less the same effect upon the fishman as the original bonk on the head did, even when accompanied by the searing contempt of Gawain's silent stare. That is to say-- no effect at all. Far less than the SOLDIER's assurance that he would pass on well-wishes to the lucky birthday girl, which at least ellicted a nod of thanks from the fishman though without any actual words spoken... until the third member of the after hours crew made his rather irritable entrance anyways.
"And you, Mister, are the molestor of said balloons, presumably. Interested in helping out with paperwork? Or does your vat have a curfew you're breaking?"
"Ah, now Sir Dart is much closer to the truth of the matter although the Research Team does not prefer to refer to it as a 'vat.' They say that such nomenclature lends the impression of-- oh, okay. Well, until next time Sir Gawain."
Azure casually held up his hand in a sort of wave without any actual waving, just still and open by his head, while Gawain retreated from the scenario to the sweet release of bitter caffeine. And again, he held still for a moment until it seemed like the SOLDIER certainly wasn't returning for any reason before turning his attention to the Turk.
"I do not have a curfew Sir Dart. As of 13 days ago, in any case, though I suppose that is subject to change at the discretion of the Team Lead as always. But at this point in time, it would be my pleasure to support your endeavors at the Department of Administrative Research, no matter what you may be assigned with at this late hour." Azure stood up from his seat finally, brushing at something on his vest for a brief moment before gesturing for the Turk to lead the way.
"I had offered to assist Sir Gawain as well, although he just noted that my security clearance did not meet the requirements of his current duties... I did not realize that obtaining coffee required such a high level of authorization. But the outcome is quite fortunate for you, wouldn't you say."
Dart offered a little wave at Gawain's departure, holding back some comment about hoping that the SOLDIER did not get lost. It seemed that his attitude had managed to sting the man a little - which, he felt, was just excellent.
The Turk eventually turned his attention back to the (much) less sensitive party in the room.
"The highly-classified company secret is wary about being allowed to handle other highly-classified company secrets. That's the most adorable thing I've all week," he said as he backed out of the room, holding the door open and beckoning Azure out with a jerk of his head. "Come on. It's time for you to learn the very powerful magical spells called the 'black redacting marker' and 'keeping-your-mouth-shut'."
He led the fish back to the desk, where he swore that the documents had managed to breed and multiply in the time that he had been gone.
Dart parked a chair around the large, round meeting's desk next to his own, and gestured for Azure to take it. From a nearby table he grabbed a random handful of pens and miscellaneous stationeries to scatter somewhat messily at their workstation of the night.
There were three stacks of documents - the one that Gawain had brought in, the one that he was working through, and the final, comparatively and dissappointly dwarf one consisting of things he had already looked through. Dart put a hand on the one in the middle.
"Start with this one. Everything sensitive has already been blacked out. You're just checking for formatting, dating and terminology consistencies, stuff like that."
He took his own seat, sighed at the largest, newest pile, and picked the top one out.
He stood in front of the coffee machine in silence, smiling eerily at it.
As he waited for his and Dart's coffee cups to fill, his own a particularly massive one, he idly wondered, watching that monstrous amount of caffeine pour, if maybe he hadn't been at this for too long now.
Reaching into the inner pocket of his jacket, the blonde man produced a simple pocket watch, flipping it open to look at the time and doing some quick mental maths before sighing.
In about 4 minutes, he would be beginning his 4th consecutive day inside of Shin-Ra HQ. He usually tried to keep it to only 3, if he absolutely needed to stay.
Needless to say, the coffee was beginning to both taste like crap and taste like his lifedew, an unholy combination of caffeine dependence and his body attempting to reject the excess of substance at the same time.
Worse yet, he was beginning to be distracted more and more by tormenting thoughts of just how very super dead his new batch of flowers would be once he finally got to his apartment.
Maybe he should just leave and let Dart deal with all of it. Sure, the younger man would probably put an explosive in his pillow if he did... But to be honest, that didn't sound terrible or anything.
His mind was brought out of these thoughts with the click of the coffee machine, letting him know his fueltank for the night was full.
And with that, the blonde man wiped away all thoughts of going home, grasping at his massive coffee cup before bringing it to his lips and pitching back his head.
Gulp. Gulp. Gulp. Gulp. Gulp. Gulp. Gu-
Ah, it was empty again.
... He supposed it couldn't hurt to fill it up again.
He arrived at Dart's office moments later, getting greeted by the sight of Dart having the experiment, Azure VI , sign official paperwork. He had the choice of either saying something or just letting Dart get run over the inevitable run away bus that would come his way.
Well, that wasn't a particularly hard choice. He wasn't in the mood to argue.
Gently placing Dart's cup of coffee on his desk, the man then placed his own on the coffee table in the middle of the office before moving to grasp about half of the gargantuan paperwork pile, lifting it up and taking it over to his corner, pulling a pen out of the inner pocket of his jacket before getting to work in silence.
For whatever reason, Azure was a remarkably quick study of "stuff like that"-- perhaps the Science Department had been putting him to use in a similar manner to this one all along. Administrative review functions weren't exactly in the fishman's original design specifications, but certainly this was putting those millions of gil worth of research and development plus 14 straight years of Shin-Ra level education to good use.
Was it necessary to fully capitalize 'CATASTROPHIC STRUCTURAL FAILURE'...?
Maybe there was a secondary function for the AZURE project, even after this whole Avalanche thing blew over and the Shin-Ra Electric Power Company continued on with their normal business of mako energy, weapons development, rocket science, genetic and bioengineering, etc. Dozens of fishmen, holed up in a series of cubicles, all tasked with analyzing and proofreading reports as the day is long, and straight on through the evening as well. Just think of how much could get done with a team like that.
... 'SHNR-77 Hornet Surface-to-Air Missile System' and 'BAZOOKA!' probably were the same thing on this report.
Of course, given Gawain and Dart's interactions with this fishman, having clones of him meandering around would probably bring them no comfort. Plus, Shin-Ra essentially already had the system set up-- It just involved people instead of genetically engineered aquatic combat units. And even if those people occasionally did things like take vacation or go on break, likely it still saved a lot of money, comparatively, in things like accelerated growth tanks, subconscious instruction, procuring additional sahagin test subjects... not to mention the sort of PR nightmare that would accompany outsourcing everyone's jobs to literal monsters.
Hmm... Serial comma or no serial comma? Maybe it was just better to use a bulleted list in this kind of formal document.
Establishment seeking reimbursement for the following:
Loss of stock (food, alcohol)
Damage to establishment furniture (tables, chairs, utensils)
Grievous bodily injury to staff (mutilation, dismemberment)
And there would be no more birthday parties, and wouldn't that just be the saddest thing.
"How lovely to have you back. Thank you very much."
That was the last thing Dart said for a long while as Gawain came back through the door. He didn't look up.
They started - or in his case, resumed. Pens clicked. Paper rustled. Marker caps came off to hover indecisively for two seconds, pushed back shut, only to quickly pop open again over the steady background rhythm of a ticking clock. Dart started to wish he had brought music.
Occasionally, the Turk shot a glance over in Azure's direction to check for anomalies, but the only thing he found for that he was inhumanly (yes) focused and had annoyingly cute handwriting. He did not look up at Gawain, because he was seeing enough of him in the paragraphs that he was reading that he had heard enough for a lifetime.
Public Security were often accused of being a bunch of drunk, corrupt brutes, and no-one who knew the Turks in any measure of familiarity would see them in a flattering light. But if you want gratuitous and largely unchecked amounts of - in the words of one of their own, "injuries, loss of life, destruction of property" - look no further than SOLDIER for all your needs.
To be fair to the man in front of him, direct references of causation were far and few in between. Trucks were overturned, facilities bisected, limbs and spare organs unfortunately pulverised - nevermind by whom, because Shin-Ra took collective responsibility. Dart, though, felt that he knew better.
And far be it for him to say that he had never done anything as bad or worse (he had), at the very least, he had never been marketed as a hero for it.
"Blue," he said. It wasn't clear when he decided that "Azure" made for a dumb name, but blue was what he was and, for now and into the forseeable future, who he was. "Double-check these, please."
He said, as he finally took a sip of the coffee, which had arrived too hot but now become too cold instead.
"And honourable, respectable SOLDIER sir," he said, leaning back in his chair. "If you and your teams could be rather more judicious in your handling, a repeat of this could likely be avoided." GAWAINAzure VI
Well, the silence was nice while it lasted. Which of course meant it couldn't be allowed to go on for anywhere near long enough.
"Thank you for the compliment. But I'm afraid such events cannot be avoided; we do what must be done for the mission!" Was GAWAIN's standard issue reply, his smile unshaken and his gaze unmoving from the paper forms he was just finishing, his hand reaching for another one on the stack shortly after he spoke. "You cannot expect anything but... exuberance from young, inexperienced SOLDIERs trying to protect their homeland." He parroted cheerfully.
"Our most recent batch of SOLDIERs are stronger and more gifted than ever. Far more than I ever was in my youth." Those J-cells they were being injected with now were something else.
It took quite a few years for GAWAIN to reach the level of physical strength some of the new recruits were managing right off the bat now. Mako infusions had nothing on the J-cells... though GAWAIN still hadn't gone ahead with the injection. Something didn't feel safe about it. Not that any of this information was something the public or the men(?) before him needed to know about.
"Please forgive any... catastrophic clumsiness on their part. The world can feel as if it were made of glass when one suddenly finds themselves gifted with such strength. They need time to adapt to their own power." he said, and the words might feel somewhat familiar to Dart and Azure, or not; depended on how much TV News either bothered with watching.
And if they did watch a lot of them: Wait a minute! This was just a paraphrasing of what he had said when interviewed on that catastrophe!
And it had worked, the lucky bastard!
"... Though it would also be nice if command allowed them this period of adaptation before sending them into missions requiring such delicate work." He sighed, reaching for another paper. That part hadn't made it to the interview.
“Thanks Holly!” Autumn called out as she pushed through the door with her shoulder. A small grin lingered as she entered the room but it didn’t reach her eyes until they fell upon several unexpected occupants. It must have been her lucky day! She’d gone out for a little after party with the girls but had to double back to retrieve her work shoes. There in front of her were three of her favorite people in the whole world; GAWAIN , Dart , and Azure VI !
“Heya boys! What’re you doing here so late?” She teased as she strode over to the desk and casually slid a finger along the label of the top file. It was quite a daunting stack. “Yikes!”
Autumn gathered her copper hair up into a high pony and flipped a band over her wrist to hold it in place before taking off her jacket and hanging it off the back of a chair. She plopped down and grabbed the top file without asking permission or waiting to be asked. Her only question, “Is there coffee?”
Ah, another nickname-- This was truly a shining moment of interoffice relations for Azure.
Or 'Blue' as it were, who placed his finished report into the correct pile and wordlessly took the new one from Dart, hunkering down upon it with his plain pen and adorable penmanship. It was more like calligraphy really; a flowing script; the written representation of a lone Wutai carp gracefully sailing through the depths of a raging river and fighting impossible odds on its way to becoming a dragon.
Which is rather how it felt in this office at the moment, except the raging river was this enormous stack of documents, and there were three carp rather than just one. Also, the reward at the end of this endeavor was less 'transforming into a magnificent dragon' and more 'momentary bittersweet relief before having to do it all over again tomorrow.' Perhaps the opportunity to sleep in an actual bed for a change instead passing out in an early morning stupor, reclined in a crusty leather desk chair.
The comfort of your own personal vat wasn't so bad either though.
"Heya boys! What’re you doing here so late?"
Ah, a fourth carp.
Azure looked up from his report as Autumn joined the after-hours crew, quickly answering her own question and dropping into an empty seat to try and provide some relief. "Miss Autumn; a joy as always. There is coffee however Sir Gawain has decreed that my current security clearance was not sufficient to procure it. I'm afraid you'll have to ask him or Sir Dart."
Some quip had began to surface, but the sound of the door flying open interrupted the words. "Heya boys! What’re you doing here so late?"
"Miss Autumn; a joy as always."
"What he said, except pretend that I said it first. Good evening, Autumn."
Morale and discipline had become loose enough at this point that Dart was using his lap instead of the desk, with his feet up on top of a short cabinet. As his fellow Turk took stock of the work laid out before them and made enquiries about coffee, he cast the folder that had been on his lap into the finished pile and allowed himself a good stretch.
"I wouldn't bother with the coffee in any case. It's - well - have you heard the one about fornicating in a canoe?"
Dart wouldn't have asked for Autumn to sit down and help, mainly because "A Turk, A Fishman and a SOLDIER..." sounded like the beginning of a really great joke that he hadn't quite fully figured out yet. But once she had sat down a familiar look came over her face that told him it would be a waste of time to argue, so all he did instead was playfully throw her a pen as she got started on a file, before he himself reached for another new one.
"How did the party go?" He asked, somewhat offhandedly. His eyes were on the file, the words, the numbers again, and quickly starting to glaze over. Things weren't going to go too quickly without his full focus, but that was being weighed against the risk of him dying of boredom first. GAWAINAzure VIAutumn Nevada